6 Comments
User's avatar
⭠ Return to thread
Regan's avatar

This is something my boyfriend and I were discussing last night - to what extent is sexual chemistry correlated with general romantic chemistry? My intuition is that they're very correlated and I'd expect the quality of the sexual connection to largely mirror the emotional connection/how well you get along and "vibe" (although I can think of counter examples with friends of mine). But, that's maybe more true for women than for men? Either way though, I agree that even if you can be reasonably confident that there will be sexual chemistry because you have a lot of emotional chemistry and find the other person attractive, it's still worth confirming that! Plus, most people just like having sex!

Expand full comment
EML's avatar

Yes and no, but people can also have sexual dysfunctions that they haven’t addressed or worked through, which you’d probably rather know about sooner than later (thinking of Charlotte on SATC finding out on her wedding night that her new husband has poorly treated ED)

Expand full comment
Regan's avatar

That's true. Good reference lol. And even if they're correlated they're not 100% correlated so seems worth making sure you do in fact have sexual chemistry at a reasonably early stage. But my reluctance to fully support this reasoning comes from the observation that sexual compatibility is not a constant anyways - through the course of a multi-decade relationship there will surely be ups and downs. So I wonder how predictive early sexual compatibility is for later sexual compatibility, probably somewhat predictive but is it like 90% predictive or more like 30%? I'm not sure.

Expand full comment
EML's avatar

I think it’s more about ruling out someone who you’re definitely *not* sexually compatible with

Expand full comment
User's avatar
Comment deleted
Feb 27, 2024
Comment deleted
Expand full comment
Regan's avatar

lol seems like there's a lot of men on this platform who'd prefer the only women they interact with to be their mom and their virginal wife.

Expand full comment